Sleep conflict cloud
Posted by jamesk | Filed under Stuff
So, here’s the rub: our 8-week old daughter only goes to sleep on top of us. It’s nice in a “I feel wanted” kinda way, but that wears pretty thin between the hours of 1am and 6am.
But, you say, that’s ludicrous behaviour, why don’t you just put her back in her cot? Yep, my thoughts exactly, but apparently it’s not that simple. Never one to avoid a challenge, I’m gonna conflict-cloud this one out.
You’re gonna what?
1. State the behaviour that you want to get rid of
I don’t want Shona needing to be on top of us in order to fall asleep.
2. State the need that is being met by the undesirable behaviour, or which drives us putting up with it
Shona gets a good night’s sleep when she gets to sleep quickly and quietly.
3. State the behaviour you desire, which is the opposite of D
I want Shona to go to sleep in her cot.
4. The need that the desirable behaviour fulfills
We get a good night’s sleep – once the midnight feast is over, we can put her back and go back to nod.
5. The objective that the needs fulfill by both being present
Well, Sherlock, if we all get enough sleep, we have energy to deal with Shona and her sister, Shona has enough energy to be in a good mood during the day.
Huzzah, there’s the conflict – obvious, really, innit. Now how to resolve it?
January 29th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
Is there a way to have Shona disrupt the sleep of only one parent each night so you can take turns?
Maybe you can supplement your conflict cloud with game theory. The ideal scenario is a good night of sleep for all. If you can’t change Shona’s behaviour overnight you can still optimise to get the best regular sleep patterns for you, Shona and Mai.